Transurfing
Part 33
The Flow of Variations: The Asker, the Offended and the Warrior
There are two extremes of human behavior in life situations: to go with the flow, like a little paper boat with no will of its own, or to row against the flow, stubbornly insisting on your own way.
If somebody is just sitting around, not taking any initiative or striving to get anywhere, but just being there, then life will be directing him. In that case, that somebody becomes a puppet of the pendulums, and they determine his fate at their own discretion. When taking a stand like that, the man is refusing to choose his own destiny. His choice is to have a predetermined destiny: “let it be whatever it is” - will be. Agreeing to such a condition, the man is claiming that you can’t escape your fate. And he is entirely correct, because for him, there just happens to be a destiny like that in the space of variations. Having made this choice, a man can only helplessly complain about his fate and set his
hopes on higher powers.
Having put his destiny in others’ hands, a man moves through life on one of two paths. Moving along the first path, he can submit himself to asking for charity for living his life, appealing either to pendulums or to some sort of higher power. Pendulums force the Asker to work, and he spends his whole life cringing before them, getting only a few crumbs to live on in return. The Asker naively appeals to higher powers, but they don’t care about him.
The Asker has given away any responsibility for his own destiny, saying, “Everything is in God’s hands”. And if that is the case, then all you need to do is ask nicely, and as God is merciful, He will give it to you. “Mountains and valleys! Rivers and oceans! Oh, the sky! Oh, the earth! I bow before your power! I am filled with reverence and belief. I believe that you will help me buy my morning newspa- per!” What, was this too exaggerated of an example? Not at all, because to great higher powers, there is no difference between a morning newspaper and a grand palace – anything is possible for them. And if you didn’t get what you wanted that means, you obviously didn’t ask nice enough! Well then, carry on asking.
There is a Russian joke that goes like this. A man is lying on his couch, praying. “Oh God, help me to get rich. I know you can do it! I believe in your greatness! I put my hopes in you and your mercy!” and the Lord tells him, in vexation: “Listen, dude, you could at least buy a lottery ticket!” That is a comfortable situation: decline all responsibility for your- self and at the same time wallow in your own inner importance. What is importance doing here? The man has imagined himself to be such an important figure that he believes that God in all his majesty and mercy cares about that one person’s well-being. God has already given man too much – freedom of choice, but, due to his infantile nature, man won’t accept this gift and is thus constantly dissatisfied.
An infantile nature finds its justification in the fact that the way towards the goal is strewn with many obstacles. In fact, there is always something in the way of a man’s goal.
And that something is balancing forces and pendulums that are the result of the man’s handmade excess potential of importance. It’s like in that children’s game (see note below), “Hello there geese - geese!” – “Honk! Honk! Honk!” - “Are you hungry?” – “Yes, yes, yes!” – “Well, fly on then!” – “We can’t! The grey wolf by the mountain won’t let us get home!”
If the role of the Asker doesn’t suit, the man can choose a second path: taking the role of the Offended. That is, expressing dissatisfac- tion and demanding something that is sup- posedly his by right. The Offended, by ex- pressing his demands, is bringing even more harm to his destiny. Let’s look at another al- legory as an example of this. A man comes to a picture gallery, he doesn’t like the exhibi- tion on display, and he considers himself to have the right to express dissatisfaction. He starts stamping his feet, making threats, de- manding that they take the exhibition down, and maybe he’ll even start destroying everything around him. Naturally, there will be some kind of reprisal following his actions. The man then gets even more offended and continues to actively rant and rave: “What! They should be bending over back- wards for me!” It doesn’t occur to him that he is only a guest in this world.
From the Transurfing point of view, both the first and the second path seem completely absurd. Transurfing suggests an entirely new path: don’t ask and don’t demand, but simply go and take.
So what’s new about that? After all, this is exactly how somebody acts, having made yet another choice: my destiny is in my own hands. He begins to struggle with the world for his place under the sun. Taking a hard stand, a man is at war with the pendulums, being drawn into ongoing competition and elbowing his way forward. Basically, his entire life is a continuous struggle for existence. The man has chosen a struggle, and this alternative exists in the space of variations as well.
We already know that both humbleness as well as dissatisfaction makes us dependent on pendulums. Remember what we were talking about in the chapter about potentials of importance, and everything will become clear to you. The Asker creates a potential through his guilt and is voluntarily giving himself away into the hands of the manipu- lators. He who asks already believes that he is condemned to ask and wait – maybe someone will give him something. The Of- fended creates a potential of dissatisfaction, turns the balancing forces against himself, and is actively ruining his own fate.
The Warrior, having chosen the battle, has taken a more productive stand, but his life is hard and takes a lot of his power. No matter how much the man tries to resist, he is only getting himself more and more enveloped in the spider web. It seems to him that he is struggling for his own destiny, while in fact he is only spending his energy in vain. Some- times a man would gain a victory. But to what price! His victory is there for all to see, and everyone is once again convinced that it is definitely not easy to win the crown of vic- tory. This is how society’s opinion on how to attain goals is shaped and strengthened: in order to achieve something, you have to be persistent and work hard for it, or fight for it
courageously.
Social opinion is actually formed by pendulums. Potentials of importance serve as a buffet for pendulums. If the aim is difficult to reach it is the external importance talking. If only someone, who possesses outstanding qualities, can attain it then it is the inner im- portance talking. On the way to his aim, the man will be fleeced. Possibly, he will be al- lowed to get to the finish line. And he will be very satisfied, without understanding that he spent his energy mostly on fulfilling demands of the pendulums, and not so much on reaching his goal.
We get the following rough picture. To reach his goal, a man must wade through a crowd of beggars. They make a hubbub, block his way, and keep grasping him by the hands. The man tries to justify himself, excuse him- self, give them money, push them aside, force his way through and fight them. Finally, with great difficulty, he gets to his goal. The energy that was spent on the actual achieving of his goal is but a small part and goes only towards moving his feet in the direction of the goal. The remaining mass of energy was spent on the struggle with the persistent beggars.
Having broken the chains of pendulums the man will get his freedom. The beggars will leave him in peace and bother other people. As you remember, in order to free yourself from the pendulums, you have to abandon internal and external importance. If you do this, obstacles on the way to your goal will simply self-destruct. Then you will be able to not ask, not demand, and not struggle, but simply to go and take.
Now there is the question of how are we to understand the phrase “to go and take” – and what has to be done so that we can “go and take” whatever it is we want? All of the remaining parts of the book are dedicated to this question and you will soon know everything about it. So far, we have only out- lined the general strategy for choosing one’s destiny. The roles of the Asker, the Offended, and the Warrior don’t suit us. What do you think, what role does Transurfing gives the master of his destiny to play in the game called life? This is your homework.
For now, let’s look at tactical ways of behaving in life situations...
Note:
Russian children’s game – the equivalent of several Western chasing games e.g. “The Game of It”. The point in the game is to avoid the big bad wolf. In this context, the wolf, of course, represents the obstacles on the way to one’s goal. (tr.)
Part 33
The Flow of Variations: The Asker, the Offended and the Warrior
There are two extremes of human behavior in life situations: to go with the flow, like a little paper boat with no will of its own, or to row against the flow, stubbornly insisting on your own way.
If somebody is just sitting around, not taking any initiative or striving to get anywhere, but just being there, then life will be directing him. In that case, that somebody becomes a puppet of the pendulums, and they determine his fate at their own discretion. When taking a stand like that, the man is refusing to choose his own destiny. His choice is to have a predetermined destiny: “let it be whatever it is” - will be. Agreeing to such a condition, the man is claiming that you can’t escape your fate. And he is entirely correct, because for him, there just happens to be a destiny like that in the space of variations. Having made this choice, a man can only helplessly complain about his fate and set his
hopes on higher powers.
Having put his destiny in others’ hands, a man moves through life on one of two paths. Moving along the first path, he can submit himself to asking for charity for living his life, appealing either to pendulums or to some sort of higher power. Pendulums force the Asker to work, and he spends his whole life cringing before them, getting only a few crumbs to live on in return. The Asker naively appeals to higher powers, but they don’t care about him.
The Asker has given away any responsibility for his own destiny, saying, “Everything is in God’s hands”. And if that is the case, then all you need to do is ask nicely, and as God is merciful, He will give it to you. “Mountains and valleys! Rivers and oceans! Oh, the sky! Oh, the earth! I bow before your power! I am filled with reverence and belief. I believe that you will help me buy my morning newspa- per!” What, was this too exaggerated of an example? Not at all, because to great higher powers, there is no difference between a morning newspaper and a grand palace – anything is possible for them. And if you didn’t get what you wanted that means, you obviously didn’t ask nice enough! Well then, carry on asking.
There is a Russian joke that goes like this. A man is lying on his couch, praying. “Oh God, help me to get rich. I know you can do it! I believe in your greatness! I put my hopes in you and your mercy!” and the Lord tells him, in vexation: “Listen, dude, you could at least buy a lottery ticket!” That is a comfortable situation: decline all responsibility for your- self and at the same time wallow in your own inner importance. What is importance doing here? The man has imagined himself to be such an important figure that he believes that God in all his majesty and mercy cares about that one person’s well-being. God has already given man too much – freedom of choice, but, due to his infantile nature, man won’t accept this gift and is thus constantly dissatisfied.
An infantile nature finds its justification in the fact that the way towards the goal is strewn with many obstacles. In fact, there is always something in the way of a man’s goal.
And that something is balancing forces and pendulums that are the result of the man’s handmade excess potential of importance. It’s like in that children’s game (see note below), “Hello there geese - geese!” – “Honk! Honk! Honk!” - “Are you hungry?” – “Yes, yes, yes!” – “Well, fly on then!” – “We can’t! The grey wolf by the mountain won’t let us get home!”
If the role of the Asker doesn’t suit, the man can choose a second path: taking the role of the Offended. That is, expressing dissatisfac- tion and demanding something that is sup- posedly his by right. The Offended, by ex- pressing his demands, is bringing even more harm to his destiny. Let’s look at another al- legory as an example of this. A man comes to a picture gallery, he doesn’t like the exhibi- tion on display, and he considers himself to have the right to express dissatisfaction. He starts stamping his feet, making threats, de- manding that they take the exhibition down, and maybe he’ll even start destroying everything around him. Naturally, there will be some kind of reprisal following his actions. The man then gets even more offended and continues to actively rant and rave: “What! They should be bending over back- wards for me!” It doesn’t occur to him that he is only a guest in this world.
From the Transurfing point of view, both the first and the second path seem completely absurd. Transurfing suggests an entirely new path: don’t ask and don’t demand, but simply go and take.
So what’s new about that? After all, this is exactly how somebody acts, having made yet another choice: my destiny is in my own hands. He begins to struggle with the world for his place under the sun. Taking a hard stand, a man is at war with the pendulums, being drawn into ongoing competition and elbowing his way forward. Basically, his entire life is a continuous struggle for existence. The man has chosen a struggle, and this alternative exists in the space of variations as well.
We already know that both humbleness as well as dissatisfaction makes us dependent on pendulums. Remember what we were talking about in the chapter about potentials of importance, and everything will become clear to you. The Asker creates a potential through his guilt and is voluntarily giving himself away into the hands of the manipu- lators. He who asks already believes that he is condemned to ask and wait – maybe someone will give him something. The Of- fended creates a potential of dissatisfaction, turns the balancing forces against himself, and is actively ruining his own fate.
The Warrior, having chosen the battle, has taken a more productive stand, but his life is hard and takes a lot of his power. No matter how much the man tries to resist, he is only getting himself more and more enveloped in the spider web. It seems to him that he is struggling for his own destiny, while in fact he is only spending his energy in vain. Some- times a man would gain a victory. But to what price! His victory is there for all to see, and everyone is once again convinced that it is definitely not easy to win the crown of vic- tory. This is how society’s opinion on how to attain goals is shaped and strengthened: in order to achieve something, you have to be persistent and work hard for it, or fight for it
courageously.
Social opinion is actually formed by pendulums. Potentials of importance serve as a buffet for pendulums. If the aim is difficult to reach it is the external importance talking. If only someone, who possesses outstanding qualities, can attain it then it is the inner im- portance talking. On the way to his aim, the man will be fleeced. Possibly, he will be al- lowed to get to the finish line. And he will be very satisfied, without understanding that he spent his energy mostly on fulfilling demands of the pendulums, and not so much on reaching his goal.
We get the following rough picture. To reach his goal, a man must wade through a crowd of beggars. They make a hubbub, block his way, and keep grasping him by the hands. The man tries to justify himself, excuse him- self, give them money, push them aside, force his way through and fight them. Finally, with great difficulty, he gets to his goal. The energy that was spent on the actual achieving of his goal is but a small part and goes only towards moving his feet in the direction of the goal. The remaining mass of energy was spent on the struggle with the persistent beggars.
Having broken the chains of pendulums the man will get his freedom. The beggars will leave him in peace and bother other people. As you remember, in order to free yourself from the pendulums, you have to abandon internal and external importance. If you do this, obstacles on the way to your goal will simply self-destruct. Then you will be able to not ask, not demand, and not struggle, but simply to go and take.
Now there is the question of how are we to understand the phrase “to go and take” – and what has to be done so that we can “go and take” whatever it is we want? All of the remaining parts of the book are dedicated to this question and you will soon know everything about it. So far, we have only out- lined the general strategy for choosing one’s destiny. The roles of the Asker, the Offended, and the Warrior don’t suit us. What do you think, what role does Transurfing gives the master of his destiny to play in the game called life? This is your homework.
For now, let’s look at tactical ways of behaving in life situations...
Note:
Russian children’s game – the equivalent of several Western chasing games e.g. “The Game of It”. The point in the game is to avoid the big bad wolf. In this context, the wolf, of course, represents the obstacles on the way to one’s goal. (tr.)
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